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Coming Back?

September 20, 2011

It is with great ease

that I observe

my own self-destruction.

and it is somewhat enjoyable

for me

others seem to

disagree.

It comes in great spurts

the destruction, that is.

I am okay for a month

maybe even

two or three.

But, eventually, the sensation

arises

and then

I

am

gone.

For how long?

who knows?

equally important

is it really me who returns?

or, perhaps

a shadow

a hologram

an almost functional recreation

of the me

you once knew

I don’t see the changes in myself

but the general social reaction

to my reoccuring

seems to be less and less

joyful.

How can you celebrate

the presence

of a guy

who is not likely to last

another year?

It sounds reasonable

or,it would

if my destruction were not

entirely my own doing.

So, potential friends

take heed

in your investment in me

I will not always be there

for you.

i will be gone

again

maybe I’ll be back

maybe not.

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