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YAAAAAAA! LADY GAGAAAA!

I am sort of

listening

to

this pop song

which features the

same

chord progression

as the song

Artifacts of the Black Rain

by In Flames

and I really want to

start

screaming

the lyrics

to that

song.

 

But I don’t think

that

the other people

in

the

coffee shop

would like that

very

much.

Coffee Stains in my Notebook

I keep spilling drops of coffee

on

my notebook

but

I’m not going to do anything

about

it

because I like the idea

of somebody

discovering this

notebook

when I am a famous

author

or

poet

(in my fantasy future(

and finding it

full of

coffee

stains.

 

I’m so

silly

sometimes.

People Used to Think I was a Nazi

I guess that’s what I

get

for

prancing around

in all black

with my jeans tucked into

my

combat boots

and with my

long

blond

hair.

 

Not that this description is

typical

of a nazi,

but people certainly knew I was going for some

unpleasant

image.

 

I do not regret having

cultivated

this angry metalhead identity

even though

it was

often

misunderstood

because

if I hadn’t gone through that

then

I probably would not have gotten

to the point

at which

I am a friendly inoffensive guy

now.

“Beautiful” by James Blunt

I really like that

song

because

I can relate to

(my take on)

its meaning

so much.

 

A lot of people think it’s just

some sappy motherfucker

talking about

how attracted he is to

some

woman

but

that line

“she saw from my face

that I was

fucking high”

just defines it

for me

even though

I just learned that it’s

not quite

about

what I thought it was

about

the idea of

walking around somewhere

loaded

and running into some really attractive woman

whether

you know her (in his case)

or not (my case)

and knowing that

as amazing as she may

be

you’ll never have a relationship

because your lifestyles would clash

so

much

is something

that

I’ve definitely

done

and thought

before.

 

And

conveniently

none of the speakers on the

VH1 special

which reminded me of that song

seemed to hear

that line

like I did.

 

Maybe they have only heard

the

radio edit

version.

 

Too bad.

 

Oh, and

if you’re thinking about

flaming my ass of

because of this

post,

I really don’t care.

Go ahead.

Your Music Does Not Suck

When I was a

teenager

I was very fond

of

the mental activity

of

hating

various styles of music.

 

I hated

rap and hip-hop

pop-punk

pop in general

and

country.

 

And I had speeches

prepared

in my head

to tell you

precisely

why any of these genres

and

several specific artists

were empirically

shitty

music.

 

I now avidly listen to

all of these genres

except country

and I feel like

quite

an

idiot

for having held

the aforementioned opinions

and especially for

advertising them

as militantly

as I did.

 

So

to all of the people

whom I informed

that

their music

sucked,

I apologise

and acknowledge that

you were right

and I was

an

asshole.

Don Veca

I have a friend

specifically,

the father of

another friend

of mine

named

Don Veca.

 

And Whenever I hear

or see

the name

Don Veca

I think that

he is

either

an Italian mob boss

or

a Spanish lord.

Ambitions

I want to

be

a financially successful

writer.

 

I want to start

and sing for

a death metal band

whose lyrics are

exclusively

Anglo Saxon Poetry.

 

And

I guess this is going to

be

a much shorter

poem

than I expected,

because

a cute girlfriend nonwithstanding

that’s about

all

I

want.

I’m Totally Gay (And there is Nothing Wrong with That)

I like to hang out with

girls

and

talk about

shoe shopping and

attractive

male

celebrities.

 

I think that smaller versions

of

everyday objects

are

cute.

 

I like to wear tight clothes

to show off

my body.

 

I spend a lot of time

thinking about

how

my hair looks.

 

I very much enjoy

hugging

other men

and do it at almost

every

opportunity.

 

But

in the end

I am sexually attracted to

women

quite exclusively.

 

It’s a darn shame.

Playing with Kittens

This is actually a picture of a cat attacking my hand. The cat belongs to a friend of mine. Her name (the cat's not the friend's) is Madeleine.

 

When I play with a

kitten

I like to convince myself

that

the kitten

is pretending to be a

lion

and also pretending

that

my hand

is an antelope.

 

What I mean by this is

that

my favorite game to play

with kittens

is the one in which

they

attack my hand

ferociously.

 

And

I will go to great lengths

to convince

any given kitten

that

this is a good idea.

 

I usually end up with a few

scars, but

the experience

which, when coupled with my imagination

of

the kitten’s imagination

is

most definitely

worth it.

The Wall Street Protests

A lot of

people

are saying that the

Wall Street Protests

and protesters

are somehow

worse

than other

historical

protests

and

protesters

because they don’t have a

clear

goal

on which they are

unified.

 

This doesn’t bother me in the

slightest.

As far as I can tell

the main message that

they are

trying to send

is something

like

“STOP FUCKING UP, GOD DAMN IT!”

 

And

to tell you the truth

I would be somewhat

put-off

if they did have a specific

goal

in mind

because

most of them are not

professionals

or scholars

in the financial

industry.

 

And

if they came up with a

solution

it probably

would

backfire

as soon as it were

implemented.

 

The message they are

sending

is pretty clear to me

to put it in less explative-punctuated words,

it is that there are people

in the public and private sectors

who know a lot about economics

and

due to greed

or sloth

are not making things right

or even

trying.

 

These people

(the protestors)

for whom I have great respect

are telling

the greedy

lazy

fat

fucks

at the top of the

food chain

that they are not

in fact

at the top of the food chain

because

a fuckload of citizens

as a unit

are far more powerful than

financial executives.